ePremal Newsletter
Vol. 8 Number 7
http://epremal.tripod.com/

In this issue :
Quote
Forward - Real history of Valentine's Day
Joke - Divorce v/s Murder
Recently In News
Short Messages

 
Quote
Care about what people think and you will always be their prisoner.
-- James Frey
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Forward : Real history of Valentine's Day

Proof that Valentine Day is Indian

A bit of interesting Indian History!

Do you want to know the true story of an origin of "Valentines Day"? Get the real scoop below.

Not-withstanding, what nonsense you've been told by the media, the truth is that the Valentine Day was originated in India, and to top it, in "Gujarat" - a state of Mahatma Gandhi who preached love, peace and non-violence.

Read further for the facts that have been hidden from the pages of history so far. Here it is:

Well, it is well known what the people in Gujarat are like, especially the Patel men folk. It is a known fact that they ("Patels") don't treat the opposite sex (their "Patalanis") with respect; some of the firebrand members of the opposite sex (wives) thought they deserved better.

One fine day, one brave "Patalani"(Patel lady - her name is unfortunately lost in oblivion), had enough of "Atyachar"(Torture) perpetrated on her, by her husband, and then she finally chose to rebel by beating up her husband with a "Velan"...Yeah, the same Velan with which she made chapattis for him everyday; only this time, instead of the dough, it was the husband who was flattened like a chapatti, albeit an oblong one. This was a momentous occasion for all the Gujarati women and a revolt soon spread, like a wild fire, with several housewives beating up their, bad as well as good, husbands with Velan; and there was an outburst of moaning chapattis all over Anand and Ahmedabad.

The "Patel" men folk learnt their lesson and behaved a bit better with their "Patalani" partners. However, there was no putting down the burgeoning feminist spirit of the times, and the beatings continued incessantly. Eventually the Patel Men-folk started improving and the frequency of the beating was reduced to once a month -usually towards the middle of the month, so that they would remain "disciplined".

Further improvement in the Patel men-folk reduced the need to more of an annual ritual, to ensure that the "Patlanis" can demonstrate the "Credible Threat"; least the men-folk forget and get back to their olden ways. And so each year that day (Middle of February, i.e.14th) the womenfolk, if only gingerly and lovingly, as a token gesture, beat up their husbands to commemorate that eventful day, which had contributed substantially to better their lot.

The men folk also submitted to this, in good humor, since they didn't really get beaten up other days of the year. The entire ritual soon became a caring and loving affair, with wives having the satisfaction of beating up their husbands, their husbands cringing in mock fear and pain, and the guys having the supreme joy of submitting to the whims of the women they loved.

This custom continued for many years, even when the British occupied India. As Gujarat fell more and more under the influence of Western Culture and language, some of the more fashionable and educated women, sometimes wearing leather boots and clothes (this even created a fad for leather "Velans" for a short time, but it soon passed, as they could not use them to make chapattis) on that day appeared with a "Velan" in hand, and called out to their husbands "Velan time" before starting off.

The British noticed this, and they were quite amused and endeared by the peculiar ritual. They also saw it for what it really was, i.e. a manifestation of love, not of hate. The ritual soon spread to Britain and many other Western countries, specifically, the catch words "Velan time" Of course in their foreign mouths, it was bastardized to "Velan tine" and then to "Velantine". And from that day onwards, 14th of February, since it was indeed that day that 400 years ago an irate "Gujarati Patalani" housewife nearly committed manslaughter, came to be known as Valentine's Day. The custom of hitting with Velans died a natural death as more modern (and lethal) equipment was made available to Gujju Girls with the advent of time and technology, but 14th of Feb still stands as a symbol of undying and universal love.

- Reported By A Velan-wielding Patelani (Patel Lady)

And we thought otherwise......."Jo tu, kevu kare che.....bahu loi piye che! Maar ene velan!"

Careful with those velans!!!!!!!!!!

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Joke : Divorce v/s Murder

A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the pharmacy, walked up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said, "I would like to buy some cyanide."

The pharmacist asked, "Why in the world do you need cyanide?"

The lady replied, "I need it to poison my husband."

The pharmacist's eye got big and he exclaimed, "Lord have mercy! I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband. That's against the law! I'll lose my license!

They'll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!"

The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the pharmacist's wife.

The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied, "Well now, that's different. You didn't tell me you had a prescription."

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Recently In News
(Courtesy : Reuters, Associated Press & Yahoo! News)
If the image doesn't open, click here.
A float featuring effigies of US Democratic presidential candidates, ...

A float featuring effigies of US Democratic presidential candidates, New York Senator Hillary Clinton and Illinois Senator Barack Obama makes its way through the streets during the "Rose Monday" carnival parade in the western German city of Duesseldorf.


If the image doesn't open, click here.
A car-fuelling robot is seen filling up a car in Emmeloord, ...

A car-fuelling robot is seen filling up a car in Emmeloord, central Netherlands, February 4, 2008.


If the image doesn't open, click here.
Painted snake : A model's hand is painted to look like a ...

Painted snake : A model's hand is painted to look like a snake's head by Italian animal hand artist Guido Daniele at Harrods department store, in central London.


If the image doesn't open, click here.
France's first lady Carla Sarkozy (R) and President Nicolas ...

France's first lady Carla Sarkozy (R) and President Nicolas Sarkozy sit at a cafe terrace in the gardens of the Versailles Chateau near Paris, February 3, 2008, the day after they were married at the Elysee Palace.

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Short Messages
Today a phone without wire is fashion.
One day will come when human
  without brain will be a fashion.
On that day, my friend, u will Rock..

A recent study showed that the average husband
only actually speaks to his wife
about thirty-seven minutes each week.
Well, yeah, I can believe that,
I mean just how long does it take to say
"Uh-huh" or "Yes dear" or "I'm sorry" ?

Every sunset gives us one day
Every sunset gives us one day less to live!
But every sunrise give us,
one day more to hope!
So, hope for the best.
Good Day & Good Luck!

Trusting God won't make the mountain smaller,
but it will make climbing easier.
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