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Vol. 2 Number 4
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Quote

You cannot discover new land unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore.
- Anonymous

Forward : Des - Pardes

1. Mother-in-law
In Des - A women capable of making your life miserable.
In Pardes - A women you never fight with, because where else you will find such a dedicated baby sitter for free?

2. Husband
In Des - A boring human species, who listens more to his mother than you and orders you around to serve him, his parents and siblings.
In Pardes - Still boring, but now a useful human species that comes in handy when the house needs to be vaccumed.

3. Friend
In Des - A person whose house you can drop into anytime of the day or night and you'll always be welcome.
In Pardes - A person who you have to call first to check and make sure he is not busy.

4. Wife
In Des - A woman who gives you your underwear and towel when you go to take a shower.
In Pardes - A woman who yells at you not to leave tub dirty when you go to take bath.

5. Son
In Des - A teenager, who without asking, will carry your grocery bags from the market.
In Pardes - A teenager, who suddenly remembers he has lots of homework when you start mowing the lawn.

6. Daughter
In Des - A lovely doll, who brings tears to your eyes when her 'doli' is about to leave.
In Pardes - A lovely doll, who brings you to tears long before any 'doli' time.

7. Father
In Des - A person you are afraid of and who is never to be dis-obeyed.
In Pardes - A person to whom you pretend to obey, after all he is the one paying your college tuition.

8. Bhangra
In Des - A vigorous Punjabi festival dance.
In Pardes - A desi dance you do when you don't know how to dance.

9. Desi Engineer
In Des - A person with a respectable job and lots of 'upper ki kamai'.
In Pardes - A person without a secure job, who always dreams one day he will be rich.

10. Desi Doctor
In Des - A respectable person with OK income.
In Pardes - A money-making machine, who has a money-spending machine at home called 'doctor ki biwi'.

11. Software Engineer
In Des - A high-tech guy, always speaks in an American accent, always anxious to queue up in the consulate visa line.
In Pardes - The same hitech guy, who does Ganapati puja everyday, and says 'this is my last year in the US(or wherever)' every year.

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Joke : Once upon a time!

An 80 year old man is having his annual checkup. The doctor asks him how he's feeling.

"I've never been better," he replies. "I've got an eighteen year old bride who's pregnant with my child! What do you think about that?"

The doctor considers this for a moment, then says,
"Well, let me tell you a story. I know a guy who's an avid hunter. He never misses a season. But, one day he's in a bit of a hurry and he accidentally grabs his umbrella instead of his gun. So he's walking in the woods near a creek and suddenly he spots a beaver in some brush in front of him. He raises up his umbrella, points it at the beaver and squeezes the handle.
BAM! The beaver drops dead in front of him."

"That's impossible!" said the old man in disbelief, "Someone else must have shot that beaver."

"Exactly!"

Recently In News
(Courtesy : Reuters & Yahoo! News)
Reuters Photo
A South Korean woman looks at an uncut 620 carat diamond, Sefadu, displayed at a local jeweller's store in Seoul January 14, 2002. The local jeweller rented the jewel from American diamond company, Lazare Kaplan, for two-weeks to be display in South Korea. The priceless Sefadu was discovered in the Repulic of Sierra Leone in 1970 and is the largest one in existence in the world, Lazare Kaplan said. REUTERS/Lee Jae-won
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Fri. 8 Mar. 2002